Can A Blog Change Your Life?

ANYTHING CAN IMPACT YOUR LIFE, IT'S YOUR CHOICE IF YOU LET IT CHANGE YOUR LIFE!!

I was reading one of my favorite blogs tonight Kristan, a girl I knew from high school. She wrote about another womans blog that she had read. I can not describe to you what reading this blog did to me. I spent the whole time crying. This woman lost her daughter in May of this year. She has so much strength in being able to talk about it. She is probably helping so many people going through similar circumstances and she is changing lives of people that maybe have never had to experience what she has. She has definitely made a drastic impact on mine.

It's amazing how much time we spend fighting, worrying about how we look or what we have, worrying about money, putting other people down, holding grudges, or not asking for forgiveness. Things like this are NOTHING compared to what some families (like the Jackson's) have had to live through and are continuing to live through every day. This woman is a stay at home mom of 1. A BEAUTIFUL little girl and one day this mother had to wake up and had no one to stay at home with. I can't imagine that. I am so lucky to be with my kids every day and every night. A luxury I so often take for granted. I'll be the first to admit sometimes I get frustrated when they are fighting or crushing food into the carpet or they spill their drink all over the floor, or when my daughter doesn't sleep in her own bed therefore kicks me in the stomach all night. These things that shouldn't matter at all because I would take these things every day over and over compared to not being with them. This woman reminded me that she would give anything to be cleaning up her daughters messes or having her daughter to wake up to in the morning even if it means she has some sore ribs.

This woman's name is Molly, her daughter that died is Lucy. Please read their blog
http://jacksonparkcity.blogspot.com/ everyone can take something away from her story. She's a amazing woman to be able to share her story and be so open.

Molly has inspired me to take a good look at myself as a mother, daughter, wife, sister, and friend. I have definitely not always been proud of myself or decisions that I have made. But truly I can say that I have grown more in the last 4 years then I have in my life. I owe that all to my Makenzie and my Kayden.

Makenzie is 4. I love how everyone says she looks like me cause to me she is the most beautiful girl in every room. I love how she comes and crawls in bed with me practically every night and cuddles right up to my back. I love how FRIENDLY she is. (I hope that never changes) I love her smile and her beautiful blue eyes. I love to hear her say I love you mommy. I love to watch her be the daddies girl she is and run to the door when he gets home. I love how much she wants to learn and how many questions she has. I love to hear her sing. She has a beautiful voice I can't get enough of. I love to see the sister she is to Kayden she adores him and takes really good care of him. I love how much she has changed my life. I am lucky to be her mom.

Kayden is 2. I love how easily he can take things apart and how good he's getting on putting things back together. I love when he comes and lays with me on the couch to cuddle and watch a movie. I love when he holds my hand and like yesterday when he opened the door for me.(Gentleman already) I love to watch him wrestle his daddy. I love putting him to bed and him saying "See you when it's good morning mommy love you" I love how attached he is to his sister. He loves his sister so much and is so protective. I love how much he loves books. I LOVE LOVE how much he loves sports. Baseball is his favorite because it's the game his uncle Justin plays. I love his dimples. I love his beautiful big brown eyes.(Their starting to go green a little) I just love being his mom. I am just as lucky to have him.

I am going to remind myself every day how lucky I am to have my children and my husband and my family. Between my scare with Josh and this woman's blog I just think that life can be so short. I don't want to waste any of it being unhappy. All the things that I stress about and beat myself up over I am going to let go. Any grudges or bad feelings I may have felt are gone too. I want to not only live my life with no regrets but I want to set a good example for Makenzie and Kayden to do the same. I want my children to ALWAYS know how lucky they are and not take things for granted.

Josh and my start was really rough and rocky at first. We were two kids having a baby, scared, not married, and poor. I felt guilty for things that I couldn't give my kids when I wanted to and having to tell them no sometimes. Now I realize that even though I may have seriously messed up other things and other relationships in my life there is one thing that I haven't. I am a good mother. My kids have everything they need and have two parents that have a hard time just parting with them for a couple hours, two parents that would give everything up to have them, two parents that love them and thank god for them EVERYDAY. I am going to remind myself of that. The material things don't matter as long as god forbid anything happened to any of us my children know that their mother LOVED them more than ANYTHING. That's my goal the spills, messes, kicking in bed, screaming, crying, fighting, breaking stuff bring it all on... It can be cleaned up, healed up, made up, or replaced. I love you Makenzie and Kayden. I am so lucky to have you and I am not going to take that for granted.